Originally published at: https://blog.12min.com/rejection-proof-summary/
How I Beat Fear and Became Invincible Through 100 Days of Rejection
Rejection does not have to be something you fear.
Instead, it can make you stronger, and teach you some valuable lessons.
Who Should Read “Rejection Proof” and Why?You have faced so many rejections that you do not believe you are worthy of success anymore?
You are wrong!
Rejection is not a reality; it is just a subjective opinion.
If you are someone who plans on giving up on their dreams or is afraid to make a change that they want to make, read “Rejection Proof” and learn more about the sense of rejection as well as about the coping mechanisms.
About Jia JiangJia Jiang is an entrepreneur and author, as well as a creator of an online course that teaches people how to face rejection and turn it into something positive.
He has founded the 100 Days of Rejection YouTube series and blog.
"Rejection Proof Summary"Everyone has faced or will ultimately face a time when he or she gets rejected.
Rejection is something you cannot escape and can happen in any area of life.
In business life, it is more common than anywhere.
However, too much rejection can make people lose their enthusiasm and quit.
Yet, usually, you have to bear it in order to become successful.
So, how do you do it?
Well, first it is important you have enough motivation.
Right now, you may be working in a field that you feel is not your true calling, and we have to give it to you – not following your passions is not an easy burden to bear.
However, you must not feel unhappy.
Instead, decide to change jobs and try yourself out at your wanted field, by giving yourself a deadline.
The deadline should tell you what you need to accomplish in a given timetable, in order to know that it is worth following your dream.
If not, you can always go back to your previous job choice.
This approach is practical since people are more motivated and productive when they have time pressure.
After you handle this one, you also need to find a way to deal with rejection.
Every business needs someone to invest in it, and finding investors is a hard job. Many times the investors you pitch to will say no to you.
However, that must not discourage you or make you feel less worthy.
Instead, it needs to be another engine that moves you forward.
But how do you to this? How do you transform rejection from being a negative force into a positive one?
Well, for starters you need to understand its psychological background.
Our fear of rejection is connected to our instinct to stay alive and to belong.
Interestingly enough, researchers show that when they feel rejected, people’s brains release the same substances as when people go through physical pain.
This means that people actually feel pain when they get rejected.
This explains the biological side of why rejection is on the list of top fears of most people.
However, many people make a mistake and mix up rejection and failure.
And to be successful and continue on the path of understanding rejection, you have to make a clear distinction between the two.
Failure is something we do not feel is personal – it is a situation that has happened due to external circumstances our of our reach. It is not positive nor desired, but does not makes us as unhappy as rejection since we do not think that it is something up to us.
Rejection, on the other hand, is hard to connect to external factors, and because of it, it is more personal and hurts people more.
However, the only way to enjoy life and all of its blessings is to beat the fear of rejection.
Just think back to all the things you did not do and wanted to, just because you were afraid you were going to get rejected.
So, what can you do to overcome these fears?
Well, since rejection is “personal” you have to change the way you look at it. In other words, do not base the external reality on the opinion of others.
Do not understand rejection as something that gives an objective picture of your worth. Instead see it as a personal, subjective opinion of the rejector, that has nothing to do with other beliefs out there.
You have to understand that in this world they are so many different people with different backgrounds and characters, who will respond a different way.
You know the saying “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure”?
Well, that is entirely correct.
Even if you have not found your chance now, it does not mean that you are not worth it. It just means that your idea is not suited for one single person.
And what is a person compared to the world?
So, stop fearing rejection, and face the world. You will certainly find someone who shares your worldview out there.
Key Lessons from “Rejection Proof”1. Rejection Feels Personal; Failure Does Not 2. No “No” Lasts Forever 3. Everything You See Around You Was Once Thought to Be Crazy
Rejection Feels Personal; Failure Does NotThe difference between rejection and failure is that the one feels personal and the other one does not.
We understand that when you feel rejected it is very hard not to blame yourself and not to feel less worthy, but you have to look at it another way, and see it as a subjective opinion of the other party, and not as an objective image that defines you as a person.
No “No” Lasts ForeverAll negative events are temporary and so is rejection.
When you understand that rejection is subjective and connected to an opinion, and not to objective reality, then you will also understand that every “no” can be changed by just changing the viewpoint.
And people’s opinions change all the time.
So, hang on, and keep going.
Everything You See Around You Was Once Thought to Be CrazyMost of the revolutionary ideas that have changed the world were once thought to be crazy.
So, if your ideas are constantly getting rejected, it does not have to mean that they are bad, it can just mean that you are ahead of the crowd seeing things others are not aware of yet.
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“Rejection Proof” Quotes[bctt tweet="But by not even asking, we are rejecting ourselves by default—and probably missing out on opportunity as a result." username="get12min"]
[bctt tweet=“If something can´t hurt me, then why should it scare me?” username=“get12min”]
[bctt tweet=“Rejection is just an opinion, remember? It reflects them more than me, right?” username=“get12min”]
[bctt tweet=“Is your dream bigger than your rejections? If it is, maybe it´s time to keep going, instead of giving up.” username=“get12min”]
[bctt tweet=“It doesn’t matter how amazing your performance or products are, if you target the wrong audience, who don’t recognize, appreciate, or need your value, your effort will be both wasted and rejected.” username=“get12min”]
Our Critical ReviewThe author does a great job in getting you motivated to change your view on rejection.
He has created a 100-day rejection challenge, which shares the concept with any other similar challenge, but it is something that can help immensely.